I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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