do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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