He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
