After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
