If i come over, it means nothing
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Randomize
