quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Randomize