Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
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