I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
