How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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