Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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