i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
