you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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