dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
