Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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