Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
