Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
