I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
