Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize