Dual....:-)
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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