question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
