White coat. Heels.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
