ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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