I understand Curling. That high.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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