There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
