Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
