just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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