kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
