Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
don't judge my taste in strippers
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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