She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
