I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
