I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
