How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
