She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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