oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize