All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
