WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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