With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Randomize
