This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize