Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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