Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt

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(631): View more from New York

"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......

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(940): View more from Texas

Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face

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(716): View more from New York

The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.

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