Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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