Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
