Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(585): View more from New York

he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him

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(203): View more from Connecticut

if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.

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(419): View more from Ohio

somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.

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(317): View more from Indiana

Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza

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(248): View more from Michigan

Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.

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