so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
