I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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