i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
