There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
