She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
