why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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