consequently i now know what mace tastes like
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
