That's intense
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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